Jigging about a bit

I don’t want to alarm anyone of a sensitive disposition, but I think it only fair to warn you that in our next production, Virtue Triumphant, some characters will be dancing a hornpipe.

One of the cast at least does know what she’s doing.

Hornpipe

Unfortunately it’s the other three who will be performing the dance onstage.

Will they get it right on the night?  They better had do, or they’ll have to deal with the wrath of a truly scary character.  No, not the Squire – the director!

Keep on shaking those thangs, fellas.

Virtue Triumphant, April 14th to 16th at Bluntisham Village Hall.  Tickets on sale soon.

 

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Virtue Triumphant Cast

It’s less than two months until Virtue Triumphant opens.  We’ve reached the “scripts down” rehearsal milestone, the point at which all the actors should know all their lines (the key word there being “should”).  “But who are these actors?” you may be wondering.  I’m glad you asked that.  Allow me to introduce the cast to you:

Becky

Becky

Mrs Maybud, a village matron

 

Becky has recently played Susan in ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’, Beryl in ‘A Talk in the Park’ and Jeannie in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Jess

Jess

Rose Maybud, her daughter

 

Jess has recently played Shirley in ‘In Need of Care’ and Bosun in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Peter

Peter

Rev. Canon Fiddle, D.D., the Vicar

 

Peter has recently played Captain Tuna in ‘Dick Whittington’, Directed ‘Deborah’s Party’ and played Chancellor Scrimp in Rumplestiltskin.
Tom

Tom

Richard Carruthers, his nephew

 

Tom has recently played Jeff in ‘In Need of Care’, Dick in ‘Dick Whittington’ and Private Underwood in ‘Hero’.
Luke

Luke

Sir Septimus Grope, the village Squire

 

Luke has recently directed ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’, also playing Lucky the Labrador, played Ernest in ‘A Talk in the Park’ and Inspector Pratt in ‘Murdered to Death’.
Richard

Richard

Luke Tumbleweed, a local yokel

 

Richard has recently played John in ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’ and Ernie Bond Rat and Sultan Pepper in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Cynthia

Cynthia

Bessie, his girlfriend

 

Cynthia has recently played Tommy the Cat in ‘Dick Whittington’, Elizabeth Hartley-Trumpington in ‘Murdered to Death’ and Nancy Seymour in ‘Deborah’s Party’.
Nicola

Nicola

Mad Martha, an eccentric old lady

 

Nicola has recently played Lola in ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’, Wormtail Rat in ‘Dick Whittington’ and Joan Maple in ‘Murdered to Death’.
Jackie

Jackie

Emmeline, a mysterious woman

 

Jackie has recently directed ‘A Talk in the Park’, played Sister Hart in ‘Hero’ and Margaret Craddock in ‘Murdered to Death’.
Daniel

Daniel

Octavius, her son

 

Daniel has recently played Rat-a-onesie in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Ron

Ron

Good Gravedigger, a likeable character
Bow Street Runner, a guardian of the law

 

Ron has recently directed ‘Dick Whittington’ and ‘Murdered to Death’ and assistant-directed ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’.
Ross

Ross

Wicked Gravedigger, a desperate character

 

Ross has recently played Nobby in ‘In Need of Care’ and Idle Jack in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Mia

Mia

Polly Popkins, a village girl

 

Mia has recently played Sharon Rat in ‘Dick Whittington’.
Christine

Christine

Director

 

Christine has recently played Miss Harriet in ‘Night at the (Brick) Museum’, Queen Rat in ‘Dick Whittington’ and has numerous directing credits including ‘Rumplestiltskin’, ‘Hero’ and ‘Robin Hood’.

Virtue Triumphant, or, Her Honour in Peril, is a comedy melodrama by Pat Norris. It is a full-blooded melodrama complete with wicked Squire, handsome hero, beautiful heroine persecuted and turned out with baby into the snow, comic rustics, flirtatious matron, susceptible vicar and other staple ingredients. Thrilling adventures include a last-minute rescue, a chase, and a plethora of murdered bodies turning into vengeful ghosts. The basis of the main plot is the Squire’s lust for the lovely Rose and his determination – on hearing of her coming marriage to handsome Richard – to possess her by hook or crook.

We will be performing Virtue Triumphant at Bluntisham Village Hall on April 14th, 15th and 16th. Why not raise a flagon of mead and join us?

Painting the village green

The peasants have been hard at work in preparation for our next production, Virtue Triumphant, as we can see.

Painters1

You might think it harsh to describe these simple, honest folk as peasants.  It may also be incorrect to label them simple or honest, but that’s an altogether different question.   As far as Virtue Triumphant is concerned though, peasants they most definitely are.  Yokels, bumpkins and peasants every one.  The only one amongst them who isn’t is of course the wicked Squire Sir Septimus Grope, lord of all he surveys and master of all who can’t run away quickly enough.  Perhaps also the vicar too, thanks to his status as member of the clergy and the closer proximity to God which that bestows upon him, may also be considered above the common herd (without giving too much away, the vicar’s proximity to God is dramatically increased as events unfold, but more on that another time).

Painters2

Before anyone writes in to point out the obvious apparent mistake here, no they aren’t painting anything green; it is clearly (and deliberately) magnolia.  So why not title this post “Painting the village magnolia” then?  Because while “Painting the village green” may be seen as a play on words, “Painting the village magnolia” sounds more like a whimsical euphemism:

The vicar eased himself carefully along Mrs Maybud’s back passage and tapped lightly at her rear entrance.  “Apologies, dear lady” he said, “if I have roused you at an inopportune moment.  I appreciate that it is early in the day to be knocking you up.  I tried round the front but received no response”.

“Why, vicar!” replied Mrs Maybud, obviously flustered, “you have taken me quite by surprise.  I was so engrossed in painting the village magnolia, I was quite unaware of your attempted ingress.  Would you care for some buttered crumpet?”

See what I mean?

A footnote for our younger reader – if you are unsure as to why “painting the village magnolia” might be considered a whimsical euphemism, or what it could be a whimsical euphemism for, or indeed what a whimsical euphemism is in the first place, or if you are confused by any aspect of the exchange between the vicar and Mrs Maybud, I suggest that you ask your parents to explain.  They will be more than happy to do so, possibly with the aid of instructional diagrams.